Dating

 

Through this week in my Family Relations class, we began to discuss some of the important aspects about dating and things to look for and things to avoid. And I thought this topic overall, was very interesting cause as a college student this definitely applies to me now. That the way someone goes about a date really says something about a person and the type of person they would be in a relationship. That these days there isn’t a whole lot of planning involved when it comes to dating these days because it mostly just involves “hanging out”. While there is some ease when going about it that way but with a planned date that is planned, paired off and paid for can tell a lot about the person. Through dating you are able to determine the personality of a person when going on dates to see the type of person they would be in a relationship. 

Through recent years going on dates has become more of just “hanging out”. And the cause of this I think is due to the fear of rejection. When you just hang out it doesn't have a title, but it still can get someone’s foot in the door to see if the other person is interested or not. Then if it doesn't work out then it’s a lot easier to deal with the rejection because it wasn’t even an official date. Also, because it is easier because it does not require too much planning, it can be in a big group, and no one has to spend any money. It is also easier to lay the friend card on someone cause nothing at all is official in any sense, for example if a boy asks a girl “hey, do you want to hang out sometime?” and the girl says “Sorry I actually have a boyfriend”, then the boy instead of having to deal with the embarrassment that he just asked a girl out on a date that was taken he can just say “I didn’t mean it like that, I meant as friends”, turning the embarrassment over to the girl. Though things would still be awkward for the boy it’s not as humiliating. But when you go about this approach is that I know many people that all they do is just hangout, and they don’t go out on their official first date until maybe a couple months of dating. Which doesn't seem like a big deal. But when you think about it, when you never go on dates when you are dating you probably never going to date that much when you are married. And when you are married and have kids going on dates is a crucial part in order to keep the spark alive. Though it does take an effort to go out on dates I think it becomes worth it in the end.

When doing out on dates it becomes a good way to determine the type of person someone would be in a relationship. One of the scenarios that my professor talked about was that when a person is making all the efforts on the date it probably means that they might not be willing to be a good provider. Say that for a date the woman makes the dinner and sets up the entire night while the boy just contributes $1 for renting the movie. And that’s pretty much all their dates consist of is just the girl setting everything up and the boy makes minimum effort to contribute to the night. If they aren’t willing to contribute very much while dating, they aren’t going to all of sudden man up when they are married. It is important to remember that marriage doesn't fix anything, it just makes things complicated.

When picking a spouse of a lifelong partner it is important to pick up on certain things early out of the relationship to see if it is worth spending time over. That though “hanging out” can become and easy way to get your foot through the door it is important to also prioritize doing out on dates create a strong relationship with an individual. 

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